Tuesday, August 11, 2009

I don't believe in Conspiracy Theories.

I don't believe that there was another shooter on the grassy knoll on that November Day in Dallis back in '63.
I don't believe that Neil Armstrong took his "giant leap for mankind" on a sound stage in Hollywood.
And I don't believe that 9-11 was an inside job.

I am, however, becoming very suspicious that there is plot against me. People from near and far are conspiring against me in the most nefarious way.


Anyone who knows me, even for a short period of time, realises that I don't like the colour purple. I don't wear purple clothes. I don't knit with purple yarn. I don't even put grape jelly on my toast. It's just too purple.

But is there really a plot against me? The evidence will prove it.

March - My STR sock kit arrived. Fraggle socks could have been red or lime green.

Nope...purple.

My favorite size of needles to knit socks with has always been 2.5mm. Sure, Signature Needle Arts makes wonderful needles and I love knitting with them.
but did they have to make the 2.5mm needles purple?

I heard that the Plucky Knitter is a wonderful indi-dyer. In June I decided to join her lace club so I could see for myself the goodness that is Plucky. Just last week the skein of 'Vintage Glass' came to my door. 900 yards of purple single ply.


Perhaps it's all a coincidence.

Not when the people that I see often, in my own city, are in on the plot too.

I finally got my hands on an elusive skein of Wollmeise in a lovely shade of green. It was gorgeous. I was asked if I would trade it and since I was trading a superwash yarn for a 80/20 yarn I thought it would be a good trade.
Who knew that Petit Poison #5 dark was ...you guessed it ...purple.

I gave up. I ran away to Sock Summit where I avoided any and all yarns with even the slightest hit of lavender, violet, or aubergine.

But the mailman had delivered a package to my door while I was gone. The first sock from the Peanuts sock club had arrived.


Happiness - Schnappiness. The purplest yarn that I have ever seen. It couldn't be more purple. If there was such a thing as a neon purple this is it.

I will not give up. I will not fold. I will continue in my quest to keep my stash purple free.

But maybe, just maybe, 'Men in Black' really do exist.

6 comments:

...AnnaRose... said...

I'm sure you'll find some people who would trade your purple ;)

See you later,
Anne

karen said...

PURPLE!!! you know who you can pawn off the p to you know. can't wait to hear about sock summit!

Heather said...

You know who is the MASTER of purple!!!

Heather

Annie said...

i got a skein of bluuuuuue 80/20 from claire tonight. do you want to trade?

ps: i'm laughing so hard about this purple thing that i could just about pee my pants. ;p

Shell said...

It looks like your purple problem will be mostly solved!

Anonymous said...

Stop it! You'll make me pee. Ha, ha.

Are you heading to Thursday night knit in at The Knitting Room? Maybe you can call ahead and have Annie hide all the purple. :)